TO MY SISTERS; The Trap Of Good Intentions
"When Good intentions become questionable..."
I realize that when it comes to relationships, a number of people may have really good intentions, they may have the desire to be the ideal person for their partners, they must have even daydreamed of the kind of relationship they want with their partners.
Where it becomes a trap is when good intentions stop at being just that; "Intentions..."
An Intention can be seen in two senses:
1. What you desire, aim or plan to do.
2. The goal or purpose behind a specific action or set of actions.
The second meaning of the word is quite interesting. It shows that for something to qualify as an Intention (whether good or bad) there must be a key element; "action" . The Intention becomes the goal or purpose behind an action.
It is quite disheartening that in many relationships today, people say they want to reach a particular goal for themselves, their boo or relationship in general but never actively work towards that.
They claim to have the best of intentions or the people at the receiving end even do most of the claiming that 'he has the best of intentions' but then how does a good intention function without the key element which is 'action'
No plan, No strategy, Nothing.
They haven't put themselves in a position that makes it easier and more realistic for those "good intentions" to become a reality...
And so a person may genuinely have a desire and an Intention but does not actively work towards it. Then "Good intentions" end up being mere talk and nothing more...
I have noticed that this is the trap alot of sisters fall into. Fighting for a relationship because you genuinely believe that he has good intentions.
Honestly, it's quite admirable that your partner has good intentions but intentions (alone) are not going to result in a functional and healthy relationship. Beyond good intentions, you actually have to put in the action.
It's like saying "my goal and my desire is to be a public speaker or an excellent Godly wife" (Amen Amen Chile🙌)
That's beautiful and very exciting to 'talk' about but what is your game plan?
What are you doing today that will make the tomorrow of your dreams a reality?
What action is backing up your good intentions?
It's beautiful but quite easy to have all these goals, desires and intentions, where it gets funny is that no one wants to put in the work...
When you say you want to raise Godly kids, that's a good and even great Intention.
But getting unequally yoked makes your intention to raise Godly children questionable.
In the end, fortunately or unfortunately, intention more often than not matters less. What people will see is your action or inaction that goes against your supposed intention.
I must add two things though.
1. There are well Intentioned people that are just genuinely unable to be what you need them to be to love you better.
There are the other group of people with "good intentions" who can but will not.
Maybe out of laziness or unintentionality but that ultimately means 'deceit' to the person at the receiving end of your lack of deliberateness.
2. There are people whose actions or inactions are constantly at opposite sides with their Good Intentions. This is a sign you have to take seriously.
Be sure you're not falling into a trap of continually excusing a person by saying he has good intentions but then his actions consistently negates that Intention.
His actions have to line up with his intentions or else your relationship may be stagnant.
It's wise to know when to draw the curtain after you notice that his talk never lines up with his actions..
Note that every inaction is also a message...
You deserve the best Sis, I hope you receive the Grace to not settle.
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Until my next Blog Post, Stay Happy
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